Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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