problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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