I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
