That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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