Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
The beer is more important than you right now.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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