Jerry, you need to find god
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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