Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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