I'm eating all of the evidence.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Randomize