So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
