Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
