Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
