Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
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