I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
