yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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