She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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