you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
