what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
