i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize