You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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