somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Even my vagina gasped.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
