is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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