DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
