you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
