He had one of those small greek statue penises
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
