Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
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