A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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