It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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