i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
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