Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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