im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
