I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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