My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
