i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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