Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
i think my cat just said my name.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
