Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
