Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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