escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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