So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
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