HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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