He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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