he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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