I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Randomize