Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
