someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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