I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I just blew my weed a kiss
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
