Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
