Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
