Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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