The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
