U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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