I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
He better not be in your backpack
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
