I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
